Luke Frey
As a child, Luke loved anything that was blue, and it just so happened his favorite animal was a lion. One Sunday while watching football with the family he discovered the Detroit Lions and became enamored with Barry Sanders and the game of football. He spent the rest of his life dedicated to the game, and he told everyone he “bled Honolulu Blue.”
Luke was a great all-around athlete from a young age, playing baseball, soccer, basketball, ice and street hockey, running track, and of course football. He played wide receiver, tight end, safety, and wherever else the coaches needed him. Later in his career, he focused on kicking. He was a four-year Varsity player for the Fair Lawn High School Cutters, and he went on to join the team at Pace University, where his football career ended.
During his life Luke suffered numerous injuries, and a majority of them were to his head. He was eight years old when he suffered his first concussion while rollerblading. The next two happened during junior football, the second of which involved him being taken off the field in an ambulance. Two more concussions came in high school, the first by sliding in a high school baseball game and another from a hard hit during a football game. His final concussion took place in college and ended his playing career for good. When he lost football, he started to lose himself.
This could not have come at a worse time. The loss of football was followed by the loss of our father, a man of many hats. Among his roles were the Superintendent of Parks and Recreation, a Board of Education member, basketball and baseball coach, and his favorite role: dad. Our dad always found ways to give back to the community and his family. Losing a parent is hard enough, but when you lose someone who believes in all the potential you have in this world and who you idolize more than anything, you succumb to the negatives in life. Luke sunk into a depression, left school, and dealt with frequent headaches and the frustrations from short-term memory loss.
After losing himself and the opportunity to play the sport he loved so much, Luke turned to coaching. He volunteered to coach a Pee Wee football team in his hometown’s football association. This brought a light to Luke’s eyes we hadn’t seen since he had to give up playing the game himself. Luke chose to coach because he knew if he could not play, the next best thing would be to educate the younger generations about a game that meant so much to him. Not only did Luke coach these kids, they would reach out to him during the offseason just so they could get a workout in or spend time with him at the fields. When Luke stopped being involved in the town’s football association, he began to lose himself a bit more.
Luke was always the happy-go-lucky, funny, charming, class clown with a heart of gold. He was liked by everyone and would give you his last dollar. He was full of love and laughter and brought joy to those around him. He was both a brother and best friend to his three sisters and did everything with his family.
But over time, he became more depressed and angry. He had difficulties comprehending what he was reading and would have to reread a paragraph multiple times. He would have to rewind the same scene on the TV over and over until he could move on to the next. He could go from being calm to punching a wall within seconds when something suddenly set him off.
This led him down a dark path in which he chose to self-medicate to ease his headaches, help him sleep, and stop the voices he was hearing that told him he was worthless. Self-medicating led him to harder drug use and eventually he started sleeping all day, couldn’t hold a job, and broke relationships with those closest to him. He finally hit rock bottom and went to rehab. He cleaned himself up for a few years and then relapsed before going back and getting sober.
Luke then met his amazing fiancé Emily and became a dad to Meadow. Meadow became his reason for living and he was his happiest being a dad, even if it was for a short time.
Even when he was happy, Luke told us all that there was something wrong with him. Always a football fan and reading every article and watching any documentary that pertained to the sport, he learned about CTE and researched it further. He felt he had some of the symptoms and was frightened for his future. He always made it known to his family that he knew he was not long for this life and that if something should happen to him, he wanted to donate his brain tissue for CTE research. He wanted to be a part of the research, to help find a way to show its effects, to help prevent it, to help find treatments, and most importantly to help those who love sports be able to play them safely.
During his final days, our family discussed his wishes and called Boston University to see what steps needed to be taken before we lost him. I like to believe that donating to the UNITE Brain Bank was Luke’s last wish and it was my job to help him achieve it. On January 3, 2019, Luke passed away of a stroke. He was 31 years old.
Thirteen months after his death, we learned Luke was diagnosed with Stage 1 (of 4) CTE. While there are still many questions and possibilities about whether or not his diagnosis helped contribute to his mental health issues, his drug use and his death, it is reassuring to know there was something that may have changed him from the boy we knew. I felt a huge relief and closure for Luke, knowing that he was right, that he knew his body and knew this could be why he chose to donate, and that he wanted his legacy to be one that could help bring awareness to young athletes like himself.
We hope if anyone takes anything out of Luke’s story it’s to know how much he loved his friends, football, and his family with everything he had. We also want others to not give up on loved ones who’ve suffered from concussions and head trauma. They are invisible injuries with effects that are hard to quantify. We do not know what they are going through mentally, how they’re thinking, how they’re feeling, or what type of pain they are suffering from. We need to stop pushing them to get back to their sports before they are healed enough to do so. Concussions aren’t to be taken lightly. What should matter is the health of each athlete.
-Written by Katie Frey (sister) on behalf of Joan Frey (mother), Maggie Quinn (sister), Kasey Frey (sister), Emily Costello (fiancé) and Meadow Frey (daughter)
Luke also leaves behind his nephew River Frey and nieces Peyton Quinn and Reese Pinsdorf, brother in laws John Quinn and William Pinsdorf, and his Aunt and Uncle Kathleen and Peter Drozd.
He was predeceased by his father George Frey, and a local scholarship is given each year in their honor for young athletes who have dedicated their time to coaching, working, or volunteering for the community.
George and Luke Frey Memorial Scholarship
28-06 Madison Terr
Fair Lawn, NJ 07410
Steven Frizzell
Brian Fronczek
Robert Fry
Jimmy Fryatt
Danny Fulton
John Gaal Jr.
Warning: this story contains mentions of suicide and may be triggering to some readers
John Gaal Jr.: A giver, not a taker
My son, John Stefan Gaal, Jr., was a smart, good-looking, strong, funny, and kind person. He was the second oldest of four children who dearly loved his mother Mary and his two sisters, Dana and Leah, and one brother, Jake. Mom served as his sounding board, Dana as his compass, Jake as his best friend, and Leah as his partner in practical jokes. To me, he was everything I never was as a young man. John grew up loving the outdoors and sports. Although winning was fun, he cherished every opportunity to take the field win or lose, be it baseball, soccer, football, or frolf (frisbee golf).
On and off the field John truly led by example. He played by the rules, believed in helping the underdog, and equally important, despised cheaters. One of the main reasons John left SLUH (St. Louis University High School) after his sophomore year was to gain more playing time in football. Much to his delight at Kennedy Catholic High School, he was cleared early on to play football and soccer – in the same season – during his junior and senior years. In John’s junior year, the boys’ soccer team finished third in the state. One year later, he scored the only goal of his high school career (the only one that mattered) that sent his team again to the final four. Afterwards, John was honored by being named as a Missouri Second Team All-State soccer player.
As a proud papa, I looked forward to watching John and his little brother play soccer and football each and every weekend. Unfortunately, to the best of my knowledge, John suffered four concussions over the course of those two years at Kennedy. Playing both ways as a running back and safety in football and nearly the entire soccer game as a center midfielder exposed my son to dangers most parents were not aware of back in 2009.
It appears that John Jr. suffered from traumatic brain injuries (TBI) which lead to anxiety, depression, and eventually him taking his life on March 24, 2017. Upon his death, we donated his brain to Dr. Ann McKee at the Boston University CTE Center. She is one of the nation’s foremost experts on Chronic Traumatic Encephalopathy (CTE). On December 6, 2017, her team concluded that John Jr. suffered from Stage 1 (of 4) Chronic Traumatic Encephalopathy (CTE).
My son was a giver. He cared dearly about those who did not have supportive and loving families like his. John worked with the mentally ill and often served food to the homeless and underserved in the Columbia, MO, area. On one occasion, a regular patron of his told John she appreciated his PBJ sandwiches but “would give anything for a shower.” John immediately tried desperately to help this woman but to no avail. Whenever he repeated this story his voice would crack and eyes would tear up.
One of his final wishes was not to merely feed the homeless but to bring shower facilities to them. So, in his memory, we created the 21-14 Concussion Awareness Foundation. To date, the 21-14 CAF has provided resources to various regional groups serving the needs of the homeless and underserved (i.e., food, shelter, clothing, showers/laundry, hygiene products, assistance for SUD/OUD and mental health, etc.) as well as funding to military and civilian TBI-related research projects. In addition, each Christmas, John’s friends and family continue to honor his memories by holding clothing/hygiene products/food drives for the needy at St. Vincent de Paul Parish in St. Louis.
John Jr. loved to cook with and for his friends and family. He was known for his backyard slip-and-slide parties and often held fire-pit sessions until the wee hours of the morning. Although I wish my John Jr. was still physically in my presence, I know that his caring spirit lives on through his family and friends far and wide. As his proud papa, I promise to do my best to honor his legacy by stopping the stigma associated with mental illness, addiction, suicide, and CTE.
Make no mistake, my son was a good boy!
John Gaal Jr.’s story was also told in the St. Louis Post-Dispatch. In it, John Sr. said, “I think we need to stop the stigma of mental illness and raise the awareness of concussions in sports. John paid the ultimate price. I’d give all that pride and glory back to have him here.” You can read that story here.
Suicide is preventable and help is available. If you are concerned that someone in your life may be suicidal, the five #BeThe1To steps are simple actions anyone can take to help someone in crisis. If you are struggling to cope and would like emotional support, call the 988 Lifeline at 988 to connect with a trained counselor. It’s free, confidential, and available to everyone in the United States. You do not have to be suicidal to call. You can also text “HOME” to 741-741 to reach the Crisis Text Line.
If you or someone you know is struggling with concussion or suspected CTE symptoms, reach out to us through the CLF HelpLine. We support patients and families by providing personalized help to those struggling with the outcomes of brain injury. Submit your request today and a dedicated member of the Concussion Legacy Foundation team will be happy to assist you.
Drake Garrett
Matthew Garver, DVM
Dr. Matthew Garver was a star athlete at Wayne Community High School in Iowa. He participated in the Shrine Bowl and went on to play college football at Kansas State University where he graduated in 1990 with a doctorate in veterinary medicine. As an offensive lineman, he faced repeated head trauma on the field at every practice and game.
Dr. Garver was determined and kind. He was a leader in his community and an amazing dad. He built his veterinary clinic from the ground up and made it a flourishing practice. Often, it seemed as though there was nothing that he could not accomplish.
But later in life, Dr. Garver began experiencing early symptoms of CTE, including erratic emotions, impulsive decision-making, and eventually memory loss. After his death in 2021 at the age of 55, he was diagnosed with stage 2 Chronic Traumatic Encephalopathy (CTE) at Boston University’s CTE Center.
Dr. Garver’s family’s wish is that his story brings attention to the disease and makes others aware they are not alone.